The Push And Pull Relationship
by Mozu The Mochi
Summary: Two best friends. They fell in love but never made it far. A tale of four years later. They knew it would be a relationship that wouldn't work out, but both are willing to take a step forward. An awkward story on which they meet four years after separation. AkaKuro, Rated T for now.
1. Prologue

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Prologue**

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"_Because you can never go from going out to being friends, just like that. It's a lie. It's just something that people say they'll do to take the permanence out of a breakup. And someone always takes it to mean more than it does, and then is hurt even more when, inevitably, said 'friendly' relationship is still a major step down from the previous relationship, and it's like breaking up all over again. But messier." _

― _Sarah Dessen, This Lullaby_

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Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

Sometimes, humans can't really hide secrets well. Their body languages always ruined it by giving out that kind of different meanings. All body parts had their own roles, and even when the human mind interpret that they shouldn't do it, the body parts always played their role.

Eyes told a lot of emotions.

Even for the blunette, Tetsuya, who'd rather boiled all emotions in an uptight face – firm-pressed lips and lazy-kind of eyes had the obvious shown in his eyes. For example, he can't flicker his gaze from a certain redhead. The maya blue pools became focused in an instant they met with a certain colour of dried blood, and they were unable to look away.

From a distance, the redhead was musing, his cheeks tinted red – and excitement pulled over.

Happy.

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

They're in love with each other.

It wasn't really a kind of an unknown secret actually, but it was untold, at least.

But it was obvious. And both of them knew the actual truth.

I mean they've known each other for a long time – the bad habits and crazy traits, the sweet moments and the inside jokes. Tetsuya knew the redhead was bad news, but he can't help himself indulging the flaws, and he wanted more. He went for some more. And Seijuurou knew he won't be able to stop his addiction towards the blunette. That colour was a drug – stop it, stop it, stop it! – and he couldn't stop drowning in those bright but soft shades.

They have secrets, hideouts, shared music – and flavours and colours – and matching tee shirts.

They have a chance of perfection.

Cheesy.

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

They're not apparently too shy, well, perhaps Tetsuya is. He loved to be alone, sometimes, and found no comfort in the kernel of loud friends. One was enough, and the one was the redhead.

Meanwhile the redhead was never one too picky, and he wasn't a shy person. Firm, yeah. And frightening, causing others to train themselves discipline once in a lifetime. Still, Seijuurou was a person , often willing to take a step further. Seijuurou was never hesitant. Yet, when the matter turns around about Kuroko Tetsuya, his feet turned jelly and his breath multiplied.

They're not tense to each other. They never did. They went to each other's houses, claimed each other's games and slept on each other's beds – together. But when the winding world of love appeared before their eyes, they became nervous – and so they took a step back.

Perhaps, they were just too scared. There were too many_ what if's _ in their heads, and they were too afraid to found out. Sad thing is, they never get to experience it as well. The bad kinds, I mean.

Pitiful.

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

Crimson and baby blue.

Two opposite colours.

Crimson was a shade belonged to Seijuurou. The shade matted his neatly-trimmed hair, and revealed the bright tone of his skin. And as for his eyes; were a pair of liquid red and raw sienna, sharp and prideful. The angry colour matched his personality; a maniac. A bossy, arrogant yet lunatic – maniac. It was a wonder how the other got attached to the redhead. Perhaps, the colour _red _also showed the meaning of enigma, and love.

Meanwhile, the colour of the sky was what you can describe Kuroko Tetsuya. A crown of maya blue as his short tresses and cerulean pools for eyes, showed that he was a soft-spoken, invisible – a man with a few words. Yet, it was a colour to control the level of lunacy coming from the redhead himself. A miracle.

How surprising, the colours contrasted but they matched; a mesmerizing combination.

But the colours never swirl, and never get a chance to match.

Dull.

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

They craved to hold hands, to lock lips and to lie on the bed and press their bodies together. They wanted to be the firsts for each other; in terms of kisses and shares and even sex. And perhaps, they could travel even further than these little things.

They wished to be complete, and to walk the same path till the finishing line. They wished to be the matching puzzle.

They wanted so many, but received less.

It was such a bad news that their paths differ at last, and their wishes never come true.

Sad.

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

It was a push and pull kind of relationship.

Just how long can they pull through?

Seijuurou and Tetsuya.

Four years after graduation, they met again.

Awkward.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Such short prologue. I have nothing to say. All I know, I'm tired because of a delayed flight, and a painful butt need to be treated.**

**Review your opinion. . .?**

**Anyway, thanks to Akakuro fans in That Cat, Mischief! My story almost reach 100 reviews! C'MON PEOPLE! HAHAHA.**

**My birthday was yesterday. 16****th**** March. Reaching 16 on 16****th****. Hahaha, it became my quote of the year. Lol.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	2. One

**Credits :**

**coolguy**

**Kaynx**

**reli-juuzou**

**ShinseiShinwa**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**One**

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**TETSUYA**

Four years.

Four years we'd last seen each other since graduation.

Four years, I didn't get a chance to see you.

Anything can change within four years.

You, who were once with that neat, schoolboy haircut and crumpled school blazer often tucked around your arm; now became someone with a classy hairstyle and wearing Valentino Rudy.

It was a reunion party; and there were bottles of _sake _everywhere. I couldn't care less about drinking or singing songs, I'm satisfied with just seeing how we would still be the childish bunch. And it turned out that some of us never literally changed after al. And I couldn't help but smiling towards Aomine and Kise, who by now, had turned drunk already – they were singing, laughing and it soon turned into a make-out session. There was nothing that we could do. Momoi was trying to ignore the two idiots. Midorima only sighed, pushing his glasses back to the bridge of his nose. And Murasaki – same as ever. Sure, he had his hair slicked to the back and trimmed shorter than the messy, neck-length locks he used to have but his mien was as similar – bored and a glutton over snacks.

But you, Akashi-kun, were different.

No, we didn't talk that day either. It sounded wrong to talk to each other once more. But you stared at me with that heterochromia pools, hoping that I at least, glanced upon you. But I had to gaze downwards. I was avoiding you, Akashi-kun. I was embarrassed.

I mean, who wouldn't?

I was the one who still remained the high school look, though I'd grown taller by a few inches. The same, monotonous pools of baby blue and the same dishevelled locks. And the same quiet, observant look.

Within the four years gap, you'd changed while I was still the same Tetsuya.

That night, I wanted to talk to you. I really do. I wanted to hold your long fingers, and felt that coolness of your skin. It was always icy, that pale skin, I mean. I wanted to curl my own fingers around yours, and swing our hands like we don't have any care. I wanted to drink wine with you – just you alone. I wanted to hear you laugh again, even when I haven't reach the punchline yet.

But I didn't get to say hi.

Not even a single hi.

The only thing I could get was that I know things had become more awkward than it should.

But the next day, you called. You called my number while I was teaching the five-year olds words that come from the alphabet _S. _And I meekly – accidentally – called you by your real name. _Seijuurou_. The kids went confused, and they wondered what_ Seijuurou_ means. I hushed them but I couldn't help but turned my cheeks into a flushing red.

You're a mean person, Sei – no, Akashi-kun.

Did you plan that out? Because it worked.

Anyway, you called because you wanted to meet. At 3PM, you told me. I know I can never refuse to you, Akashi-kun. Anything you said was an order, right?

I was a bit happy when you invited me. But there were others too; nervous, scared, worried. I don't want that awkwardness between us. I wanted us to meet like long-lost best friends.

I wanted us to meet as more than friends.

But four years ago, we couldn't.

"Akashi-kun, do you think it's a little bit too late?"

**SEIJUUROU**

The only thing I gave him was silence, because I was thinking of his question. A train of thoughts came rolling into my mind, and I found myself droning in between the line. My fingers, were they shivering?

"I don't know, Tetsuya. . . I don't know."

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**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Mozu : Another short one. I felt like this story should be typed with little details because. . . I don't know. Other stuffs seems unnecessary to be written in this story so I just kept it. . . monologue. **

**How was it? Type X if you like, O if you don't like.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	3. Two

**Credits (Thanks, guys – you all sho shweet~) :**

**Guest – Xie xie, here's the new chapter! I'm not sure if I'm going to insert the 'it' now. Huehue.**

**ShinseiShinwa – Here's a tissue if you need one, hue. I'm glad you like it. This story can be short, it can be long. Me dunno. Erp. Erp.**

**Kaynx – Yay for Xs! Here's another update!**

**coolguy – Merp, why you so cool guy? Hahah, fail meme. Merp. What does theriouth mean? OMG, new word?**

**Kuro13Dead – Here's the update!**

**Guest (another guest, welcome lol) – Thanks for the Xssssss~! OMG why the crying face, here's the new chapter!**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Two**

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**SEIJUUROU**

_Ne_, Tetsuya.

Am I different now?

Have I changed from the past four years?

That night, you looked at me as if I was a stranger. Perhaps I am now – since after that day, we'd never talk. Or was it because my hair – it used to be short after all – had outgrown from the previous hairstyle. Or was I acting colder than before?

Tetsuya, I wished you look at me with those big, blue eyes of yours. Not just a brief glance, but the usual, daydreaming stares of yours. It seemed that they'd became a lot more monotonous than before.

Four years ago, they were a pair of shining blue. Even though you happened to be a somewhat emotionless person, you had that contented aura radiating around you.

Was it because I was with you?

Anyway – I'd wanted to talk to you that night. A reunion party was supposed to be when we. . . reunited. I mean, we should be talking about the past few years; what had you been doing, what I'd been doing, are you married? (it's possible since we're twenty-two) – I'm saying that we used to be close. But why were you avoiding me, Tetsuya?

Nobody should avoid my gaze like that.

But it's okay. Since you're Tetsuya, I'd given you a chance. Though you should know I'm finding ways on how to talk to you. I wanted to know – about us – what about us?

Even I, Akashi Seijuurou, had no clue.

High school years are precious moments. But high school years are times on which discrimination happened a lot. I know that you are afraid – you always were. Those eyes were my proof; the pair of maya blue which became duller when a rumour started. You were afraid that you, one day, became a part of the bad side of rumours. You desperately hid in the shadows; to avoid being the kernel of attention. And that was why you were afraid to – to advance our relationship, something like that. Because public. Public had its own rule; the rules that was able to send you to the lowest pit of shame.

Still, I knew you wanted us to hold hands, just being the two of us – being two lovers. Publicly.

But it had been four years now. We'd gone our separate ways. It was different.

So when you asked me, if it was too late. I'd replied that I don't know. Because to be honest, I really don't know.

We weren't broken, just separated – and that made it a lot more complicated.

"Just meet me at three, Tetsuya," I said despite the agitation.

"Tetsuya, huh. . .", he sighed – was it relief? It sounded more like a sense of longing. I can't tell.

I felt my brow furrowed, confused. "What's wrong with that?"

He probably tensed because there wasn't a single response for a matter of seconds. "It's just that. . . It's been a long time since you called me that – and. . . I don't know."

"You don't know about what, Tetsuya?"

"Calling you by your real name."

"Just say it, Tetsuya."

He didn't.

Tetsuya closed the line between us.

**TETSUYA**

Seijuurou.

Weird.

It felt weird saying the word.

Just one word.

My hands were shaking, and I was sweating for no reason. It was just a name. Yet, calling out the name from my lips was like learning how to speak profanities.

That name seemed foreign to my mouth now. Maybe I could; a couple of years ago. Prior to high school years, I like to call him by his real name – or sometimes, if I'm daring enough; _Sei-kun. _Now, it was just _Akashi-kun_.

"S-S-Sei. . ."

I'm trying to say it once again. He told me to, after all.

But I can't.

I just can't.

My mouth felt dry, and my throat couldn't mutter a sound. I'd swallowed a lump in my throat, and proceed to say it again.

I couldn't.

_Gomen_, Akashi-kun.

**SEIJUUROU**

Tetsuya came late to Maji Burger (I chose Maji Burger because I remembered he used to drink a large number of vanilla milkshake here). He looked tired, and sweaty; but still the ever-so-similar Tetsuya as always. He looked as if he was wearing his teenage clothes – which was adorable – but I wasn't able to say it out loud.

As assumed, old habits die hard after all. Tetsuya was still. . . the same Tetsuya; he ate less but a glutton when in comes to vanilla milkshake. In front of me, he was avoiding my gaze while sucking the straw vigorously even though the drink (the third one) had finished.

"You're not going to eat, Akashi-kun?"

_Akashi-kun_.

Why won't you call my name, Tetsuya?

You're being rather unfair, aren't you?

"Hmm, I'm not that hungry," I bit the insides of my cheeks; dissatisfied, and a bit of that rush of anger.

He continued to glance upon the customers, or finger-drawing against the table. "Oh."

The conversation ended.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : I'm so evil by giving you short, short chapters. And besides, writing Akashi is not easy. It never was easy. I'm trying to make then In-Character as possible. Buuuut, it's so difficult! Now, I'm stress-eating.**

**There was Sports Day yesterday, and the house I'm currently in (Collier, Red Team yasss) lost in cheerleading. But we got 2****nd**** place, which is not nice cause Henthorne (Blue Team, lol see the chemistry? *wink) won, like, in 6 consecutive years. And Red team and Blue team hate each other. Lol. Love-Hate relationship. That's why I'm telling you this. XD**

**Happy Good Friday everyone!**

**Press X if you like, O if you hate it, shout my pen-name if you don't know where this story is going, shout your own pen-name if you beg for an update. :D**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	4. Three

**Credits :**

**Kaynx**

**coolguy**

**Clavemien Nigram Rosa**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**Kuro13Dead**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Three**

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**TETSUYA**

Four years ago, we were comfortable with the silence.

We practiced basketball as usual. You, with the glistening sweat under the bright ceiling lights and having your palms brushed off the fabric you were wearing – looked at me with the heterochromia eyes softly, and a kind gesture of smile.

Have I ever told you that I love your smiles?

Every bit of them; the sinister smirks, the forced pull of the lips, and the genuine, wide smiles; looked sincere when directed to me. I'm flattered, and my cheeks refused to stop from the crimson flush. My body was sometimes mean, disobeying its master by giving out obvious signals. Signals that I wanted you, not as a friend but a lover.

And you understood me the most under many circumstances. Explanations be damned, you read the air like you read my mind. You knew what I want despite my plain expression – and that you knew I wanted to see your smiles always.

Sometimes, our fingers would touch. But we made no progress to tighten our hands together, or curling your slender ones to mine. I wanted them to intertwine like vines, and the bond stayed strong. But they only touched brusquely. And then, it was over.

Four years after, I realized we haven't even touch. Yet.

Sipping my fourth round, I stared with big, blue eyes towards the fingers which were tapping on the table. The silence was unbearable – for the first time – and dreadfully, I wanted to ask you questions.

Hey, Akashi-kun. . . Why had we changed so much?

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**SEIJUUROU**

You've become a lot quieter.

Once, I understood your silence as pure comfort. You preferred the deadly silent because you get to enjoy the little things we created (but never once the big things happened). Now, I wasn't able to know anything from the pallid blue. They looked like unpolished gems; dull and shadowed and filthy.

You looked like you wanted to start a conversation though. Your lips started to gape apart, but closed them instantly once our gazes intertwined.

You were nervous, and that I realized.

"Tetsuya. . .?"

Upon hearing your name, you jumped from surprise.

"Y-yes, Akashi-kun?" Nervous tinged in the soft voice, your pale face as well.

Almost, I smirked. But I held the gesture and kept the monotonous expression but slightly tilted my head to gesture a sign of confusion and curiosity.

"Are you alright? You looked flushed."

"Ah?" You touched your cheeks, and the shade increased twofold. God, what a sight? How a blush could make a person more stunning than before was a question I have yet not known the answer. ". . . I'm okay, Akashi-kun."

Then, the dreadful silence crept out once more, prancing like a ghost that gave shivers to the skin.

We didn't talk much that day either. At first, I only wanted to see you once again. That was the sole purpose of inviting you out. But once the day signalled our time was over, I felt it wasn't enough. The desires doubled, from just looking at you in a distance of two metres to wanting to talk to you about, literally, everything. About what happened in the four years gap. I wanted to sit beside you and ask about your day. I wanted to tell you jokes, and listen to your rare laughter and gawk upon the vigorous shake of your slender figure.

So that night, I called you for the second time of the day.

Well, that was a record.

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**TETSUYA**

"_Tetsuya."_

Oh God, why would Akashi-kun called in the middle of the night? It was 8PM, and I was busy preparing dinner. Nigou was fed just a few minutes ago, and the latter wagged his thick and furry tail joyfully while he attacked the food in the bowl. Chopped carrots and onions were pushed aside along with the chopping board as I picked up my Lumia X.

"Yes Akashi-kun, what is it?"

"I'm standing in front of the entrance door."

"YOU WHAT?"

No, I didn't shout. The tone could still be categorized as inaudible but the surprise existed. And my hands were shaking, palms suddenly turned sweaty than before. Hurriedly, I ran towards the living area and to the front door. Right, you were there – wearing casual jeans and what appeared to be Braun &amp; Buffel bag slinging around your left shoulder. Your hairstyle was a tad different, the bangs pulled upwards with hair gel.

Gosh Akashi-kun, could you not be the death of me, for at least, one day?

My appearance didn't match. Not with a girlish apron tied around my waist. I looked lanky, too skinny; and my mart-bought shirt was baggy.

Nevertheless, I opened the door anyway, my breathe hitched into short pants.

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**SEIJUUROU**

You looked messy. Messy, but beautiful – stunning, even.

The cheap, grey shirt you wore looked like a dress in your lithe contours and I couldn't stop but wondering if I would take you out for a candle lit dinner. You were wearing shorts; that daredevil pair of shorts showing the rest of your legs, a small part from your thighs down to your feet. I wondered if I started having a leg fetish by now. But I do know that it was your fault, Tetsuya.

And I only noticed your hair grown an inch longer – or perhaps your fringes did. Because, when my eyes shot up, I saw your fringes tied into an apple hairstyle. Honestly, you looked like a girl. And the pallid blue pools softened with a slight blush brushed across the alabaster white skin. You looked. . .

"Cute," I blurted out, and my face pulled into a twist of shock.

You were shocked too.

But what happened next was much surprising then my sudden outburst.

Perhaps, you weren't able to control it anymore. In a flutter of seconds, I saw your lips stretched upwards and you laughed a merry tone.

You laughed.

I felt my own smiling as well.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : These two will be the death of me! I'm sorry for the late update though. School festival is coming up within two weeks and we are preparing the set-ups for a photobooth. It's our last festival so we thought of doing our very best. Our class would have nerfs, selling flower crowns and perler bead bracelets, PS3 Fifa competition and photobooth for entertainment!**

**Do review! Support the author with reviews, even if it's only short words! (That's what I see in most accounts, lol)**

**X for love, O for dislike and XOXO if you're confused.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	5. Four

**Review Credits :**

**Akakuro Seiya**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**BlackCat**

**sayeunhae**

**Sorry if I can't reply to your reviews. I truly am. I'm just so. . . busy. Teenage life, bruh. Hahaha jk**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Four**

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**TETSUYA**

I never meant to laugh.

I wanted to cry.

Pure happiness made butterflies swirled in my stomach, and I felt like I could scream all day and actually tried to hug Kise-kun. That was some sorts of happiness I was having, but the expression I held afterwards said otherwise. . . The same dull press on the lips, and emotionless eyes as usual.

But I could see that you were beaming as well. You quickly shrugged off your shoes, putting them neatly beside the shoe rack and went straight to the dining table. Several minutes of preparing dinner (I'm also touched because you helped setting up the table, I mean, it's the first time. . .), you still had that shockingly bubbly demeanor. I mean, you were never a person to enjoy a dull dinner. I knew it because during high school, Kise-kun often invited us to our home and they served us with the usual family dinner – and you looked as if you wished to be in a fancy five-star restaurant instead. Yet, I noticed how you were actually indulging every food I was serving you; the way you held the chopsticks and how you swallowed. . .

Akashi-kun, perhaps you are excited?

The thought went awkward in my head, and I shrugged myself from reverie.

_Stop thinking nonsense! He's just happy to see you one more time. That's all. Yeah, that must be it. Wait, why am I happy? It was just a compliment. . ._

There was nothing more than I would rather do but to dive my head against a pillow and kill my thoughts.

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**SEIJUUROU**

It was that kind of silence again. The comforting type; but I could feel some sort of improvement. It was the silence I longed to have, what I missed the most throughout my hectic years. And we were only eating dinner, you with the pallid blue orbs glued to the half-eaten food, still too nervous to look straight. Yet, you had contentment flashing in your eyes. That was enough to make a smile latched onto lips. I felt the need to proceed – but this was satisfying enough.

So, for an hour the tranquillity of some sorts remained in the thick air.

I'd heard the skies rumbling; and for once, fear crossed the sapphire glow before it dissipated within seconds. You were trying your best not to show your fear towards the thunder, but as always, you can never lie to me, Tetsuya. And it rained afterwards. Hard. You could hear the thunder starting to cross its way to the city, each five minutes the sound like a roaring tiger went louder and louder. And that was the moment I had yet to enjoy, seeing you like that; with your fingers fumbling against the fabric of your shirt and the trembling body but slicked with sweat.

"It's raining," I stated the obvious.

"Y-yeah. . . You should've been home earlier."

"It's too late now." You had your brows scrunched, perhaps sensing my intention.

"Akashi-kun. . . you –"

"Can I?"

"W-what?"

You were blushing. How adorable.

"Can I stay the night?"

"Until the rain stops?"

"Until tomorrow."

"T-tomorrow? B-but. . ."

My grin went wider. "I can't."

"No, I mean. . . my bed is small. . ."

"Tetsuya. . . I never said anything about sleeping on the same bed with you. Are you inviting me?"

Your face turned pale, and then several shades of crimson before you made your fists sent weak punches to my chest whilst mumbling the word _naughty _multiple times. I laughed so hard – for the second time of the day – whilst clenching on my stomach. You were still frozen as ice, attempting your best not to sulk. But you did anyway, puffing your cheeks whilst turning around.

"Akashi-kun is unfair. You are going to sleep on the couch! No excuses. And no entering my bedroom. . ."

"Is that an order? You know you can't order me," I hummed.

"Well, Akashi-kun is not a captain anymore. I can say anything I want, right?" He smiled victoriously as he stood up to collect the dishes. I scowled, but he was correct about it though.

_Wait until you become an Akashi, then I can order you as a husband,_ I chuckled inwardly.

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"Akashi-kun, do you need a change of clothes?" You asked from inside your bedroom. I could hear the stomp-stomp-stomp footfalls until you appeared in front of me, holding a spare tee which appeared to have a picture of a rock band, and blankets.

"Will it fit? I mean, I'm not soaked or anything so I think I'm fine." _Wait, I should've just accept it. . . for other purposes._

"Okay then, here are some blankets to keep you warm. The AC gets really hardcore during the night."

"Thanks," I gestured you a genuine smile before I continued watching MTV, and scowled when it showed the imbecilic _Keep Up With The Kardashians _show ad instead.

You returned a while later, having changed to a simple white long-sleeves and trousers. You had your hair wet from the shower, and the bangs slicked up and I couldn't help but chuckled.

"What? Why are you laughing?"

"Nothing."

_You're cute._

I wanted to say that. But you were too focused when a song started to appear, so I bit my lip and proceed to join.

The comfortable silence came again, despite the distance between us was still apart.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Well? Well? It's been a month. Midterms are done for! Like seriously, I never look at the teachers the same way again. They were laughing when we complained the paper was hard. And I'm not looking forward for the punishments. . . I mean, have you been told to duck-walking along the corridor?! That's the hardest shit to keep up. *cries***

**I still like this story. No matter what. Believe me, I'm still working on the next chapter, and the next and the next and after I'm done with this I'm gonna do another!**

**X if you like, O if you don't. XOXO for hug donation. Huehuehue.**

**Confessions : I think I sucked being an author. Something about my writing is ugly. I'm remaking my stories over and over again. Dx So much for insecurities. Fuck you, dark side of me!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	6. Five

**I'm still loving this fic! Should I keep with 10 chapters or make until 20?**

**Kuroko No Basket belongs to um, whoever makes it. But, but, but I would like to keep Akashi to myself.**

**And the plot goes something like this : **_Akashi and Tetsuya had been long separated for four years. When they met each other again, things became much different. It happened to be an awkward reunion, not the least bit happy. Thus, the reason both of them are willing to go all out to try out chances for a relationship they had forsaken during their high school years. They push, and they pull – but never made a true, further progress in between their currently weak bond._

**Credits :**

**Akakuro Seiya - Well hello friend! That's my habit as well, lazy to login xD**

**Rinfantasy - Aw, thanks for reading my fanfic! I can guarantee you, there is no depression in my story. Yet. Well, it's nothing serious! xD**

**Scarlet Aki-chin - So many Xs. . . I feel loved! Thankyuu!**

**ShinseiShinwa - Hello loyal reviewer! Oh well, my friend got a freaking B and my teacher posted in Facebook saying, "Well, look at this student! It proves my questions aren't that hard at all." Dammit. Hahaha xD Oh yah, I shall really make a chapter about that particular idea soon. Haha~!**

**mitsuyo-chan - Your idea inspires me! Thank you so much! Do enjoy this chapter dedicated to you!**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Five**

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**TETSUYA**

The thunder had been bothering my nerves lately. Each five minutes, the sound cracked on the skies, causing me to flinch. I had this fear towards lightning since I was in kindergarten. I'd seen the lightning, a flashing streak of blue and white across the lawn. Shocked, I would come to tears and started to search for something that would lull me to sleep. And _okaa-san _played the role, always comforting me when she found me with my cheeks wet with tears, wailing and pleading and cowering for comfort.

That was why I was so close to tears right now. Yes, I might be over twenty but fear was something that could not be undone easily. _Okaa-san _wasn't here, so I was shaking and tugging on my shirt like I was fully dependent on it.

"Tetsuya?"

Ah, I forgot you were there, Akashi-kun.

"Y-y-y-yeah?"

"Why are you shaking?"

You were looking at me suspiciously. I hoped Akashi-kun won't find out. But this was an Akashi we were talking about. He must've been thinking about me as well.

"M-m-m-me?" Oh Kami, please make me stop my stutter!

You chuckled. "Are you scared?"

"Scared. . . of what?"

"Thunder. Since you've been shaking each time you noticed a lightning."

"Of course I'm not sca –"

My head dove to the couch when another roar crossed in between the pitter-patter, and I realized the tears were finally out.

And when I thought the nightmarish song from the heaven's skies was finally over, I peered from my position only to leap once more when another arrived.

Well, my body sure jumped – and my mind was whirling elsewhere – but when I broke my reverie, I found myself curling against a familiar chest, and my hands draped across the body.

Akashi-kun. . .

Akashi-kun?

AKASHI-KUN!

When I recoiled, you had your lips curled upwards, ready for an outburst. A second after, I could only stare – red-faced and fuming – as you laughed with your hands clenching your belly.

"I. . . I'm just surprised. I'm not scared!"

"Tetsuya, I didn't say anything. . ."

I think my blush worsened, and I gulped furiously.

Gosh, I think I feared you be my death rather than the thunder.

Akashi-kun, you _baka_!

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Aa? Aaa? It's short and a filler but I saw the review from mitsuyo-chan so I thought I'd make it real! It's a great idea actually, so here you go! xD**

**Anyway, I just started on Naruto because this one fanfic called **_**The Uchiha Couple **_**was like so cute, it got me hooked up to the series just so suddenly! I don't know if I'm the only person who started watching Naruto because of a fanfiction!**

**We've got Teacher's Day celebration last Thursday. As prefects, we were the one hosting the events (we host every events in the school actually xD). One of our Head Prefect even comes at 4AM to do the last touch-ups. It was fine in the morning, but suddenly my classmate did a bad performance and the blame was put to us, the prefects! I've seen the two head prefects shaken up and the girl's head prefect was crying. We were not appreciated at all! And then, the juniors created a ruckus by stealing handphones and we had to round the whole school again! They're so rude and they call me 'fucker'? Aiyah, it made me so angry thinking about it again. *cries in Spanish***

**As usual, X if you like O if you don't.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	7. Six

**CREDITS :**

**Rinfantasy - Today's youth makes me wants to cry. Anyway, thanks for the review!**

**Scarlet Aki-chin - And then, you woke up with my name flashed on the recent updates. What is your reaction? xD**

**mitsuyo-chan - Haha! Yeah, it was fun writing it! And here's another update~!**

**Akakuro Seiya - xD**

**ShinseiShinwa - xD Omg, you got me laughing here. Hahah! Rape face! xD And yeah, I never had the thought of watching Naruto until I cross that fanfic! You should read it. It has 88 chapter for God's sake!**

**Kuro13Dead - Thanks! Now here's another one! :D**

**Time skip! I don't really have to explain morning routine and everyday life, don't I? Also, I don't have to explain that words written in italics mean flashback. I mean, most of you already know and a lot of authors do the same as well. Anyway, I just don't want to say things like 'flashback' or 'present time' in the story. I want to make it as novel-ish as it can.**

**Warning : Not proofread! It's 12AM and I was rushing to bed. Sorry! I'll fix it another time.**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Six**

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**TETSUYA**

_The day we'd graduated wasn't pleasant, especially when I saw your face sullen and grim and the pair of crimson and sienna shade couldn't even lift to see me standing a few metres from you. You'd clutched the graduation scroll tightly, biting your lower lip in exasperation._

"_Sei-kun?"_

_Sei-kun. How funny the name tasted in his tongue; sweet and yet bitter, and I felt my jaw clenching. I wondered if the pet name would linger until we both grow up._

"_Tetsuya. . ."_

_My brows furrowed, holding an alarmed air. "Is something wrong? You don't seem to look good today."_

"_Nothing much. I'm okay, Tetsuya."_

"_But –"_

"_Thanks for worrying about me."_

_I could still remember your hands, callused yet gentle and warm, stroking the soft streaks of blue hair. Back then, you seemed to have that enjoyable look as you gawked at me squirming beneath your hold. But I let you anyway since it was the only thing making you calm._

"_Are you free after this?" You asked, neither feeling bothered at the fact you entwined your fingers with mine. Heartbeat thumped loudly against my chest, and I was afraid that you might be able to hear it. I nodded my head, meekly._

"_Are we going somewhere?"_

"_I'm taking you to a place I often visit if I'm alone," you paused to smile, "Now, I'm showing you the secret."_

_Frowning; "For Sei-kun to have a secret that does not involve me is kind of offensive. Well, Sei-kun is always mean anyway."_

"_Hey, at least I'm nice enough to show it to you now."_

_We both laughed._

* * *

_Old and abandoned, but safe to be entered; it was a forsaken train station you brought me into. We slid in easily like our own home, and soon enough you led me to the railway tracks devoid of any signs of incoming train. It actually serene; I could see the birds fluttering about and the skies spread before my own azure eyes. Never would I thought someone like Sei-kun could choose a place like this one. I gasped in awe._

_You still had the uneasy look flashing in the heterochromia eyes, but for now it ceased for a bit and was replaced by contentment. Slightly, but it was enough._

_The grip around my wrist hadn't yet loosened, and instead was becoming a lot more painful. I flinched, and brushed your hand away in a gentle motion._

"_I never thought you would be hanging out in a place like this," I mused, showing one of my rare grin._

"_Even I need a quiet place, you know?"_

"_Library is a quiet place. . ."_

"_That place is for you, Tetsuya. I'd rather not see anyone sometimes, well maybe except you."_

_Hearing this, I chose to ignore the blush adorning my cheeks furiously._

"_Come here."_

_You curled your hand around my wrist once more – sometimes I think you're addicted at holding my hand – and pulled me gently to a ladder, leading to some kind of an unfinished part of construction._

_But when I saw it, I let out another genuine gasp. You know that scene in movies where the heroes get their own chilling place? Yeah, Sei-kun's was like those places in the movie. There wasn't anything much though, but there were couches and a small bookshelf, and a handmade hammock swinging to and fro._

"_I think you played Subway Surfer way too much. . ."_

"_Nah, it was my own idea. Trust me," you said proudly as you sat cross-legged, facing the wide scenery of the railway tracks._

_We could see the southern part of the city ahead, and the sunshine glittered at our side providing us with some warmth. There was the silence again, although it was comfortable I could sensed Sei-kun's uneasiness slowly causing the air tense and stiff once again. Sucking back my breathe, I gathered some courage to bring myself to ask._

"_Sei-kun, what's wro –"_

"_I'm leaving. . ."_

"_Hm? To Kyoto?"_

"_No. Father sent me to study abroad."_

_Oh._

_Oh. . ._

_That's why._

"_I see." I never realized my breath went shaky, and that I was slowly leaning towards you. "I won't be seeing you again."_

"_I know. . ."_

_We spent the day in silence, dwelling with our thoughts. Till the sun crept back to its horizon, we were still there, sucking in each other's presence. You told me about America, about Cambridge and the things you would do there. And I told about being a nursery caretaker. It was the typical conversation of every graduated student; about future and departure._

_I never knew why I couldn't cry, I just never did. Maybe because you were close to me, shoulder to shoulder and I could still feel your warmth as we walked at the lone streets. Staring deeply into the mismatched eyes, I could now understand the morose._

"_When will you return to Japan?" I asked when I reached for the doorbell._

"_A couple of years maybe. . ."_

"_Okay."_

"_Tetsuya –"_

"_Hm?" Oh God, what is it?_

"_I. . . I. . . I'll see you at the airport tomorrow."_

"_Okay."_

_When I had my back pressed against the door, I could feel rivulets slowly coming down from the corners. In the end, we never did tell the true secrets that night, either. I felt my chest, once fluttered with a light and fleeting feel, was heavy and painful._

"_I'm sorry, Seijuurou-kun. . ."_

_The next day, I never made it to the airport._

* * *

I kicked the pebble out from the tracks, brown leaves of autumn scrunched beneath the boots. Waves of nostalgia flushed through my mind, and soon enough I found myself in front of the train station you used to claim as your serene place.

The breeze was awful today, abusive and cold and felt like I'd been slapped countless times. It blew with the leaves, sometimes poking my eyes and sprang out small tears. Not wanting to look like I actually cried, hastily my hands brushed over my face.

When I opened my eyes, I was met face to face with a flash of two pools of liquid crimson and raw sienna. You had a soft smile, and a scarf hiding half of your face. The breeze fluttered again, and I had the urge of brushing my fingers against the bright red locks.

I felt my own lips stretching as well, my arms hugging my lithe body.

"Seriously? No 'welcome back' or anything?" Akashi-kun smugly grinned. You took a step forward.

Laughing, I choked back the dread feeling and instead swallowed the contentment whole. I don't know why, but nostalgia made me teared. This was it, I told myself. Four years, and you kept your promise. I should be happy. The tears shouldn't come I tried a best attempt to show Akashi-kun a genuine smile, but what came out was somewhat akin to a whimper. In the mid-autumn, the weather was never fine – the storm was yet to come and brown leaves were sent flying like tiny birds in the frosty night. But it was okay, because you were finally here and it was enough.

"W-welcome back, Akashi-kun. . ."

You laughed.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Fast update, eh? Haha. Yes, I have free time.**

**Nay, they aren't a couple yet. We're still in the 'friend' stage. You think I might be easy on you? *evil laughs***

**Anyway, we got our two weeks holidays and TV shows are boring. Tell me what I should watch~ I'm so bored~**

**X for love! O for dislike!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	8. Seven

**Credits :**

**ShiroNekoIsMe – So many Xs! I like it! Thaaank youuu. Haha. I'm glad the sadness reached you. xD It's meant to be sad but I actually don't know how to really write sad scenes anymore. Heh heh.**

**thepockywrites – Here's the next chapter! That amount of Xs are already good enough. XD**

**Rinfantasy – Thank you! Smiley to you too :D**

**Akakuro Seiya – Ah you! Haha. XD I'm glad you love it. Thanks for the food *eats Xs***

**ShinseiShinwa – Drama, like Asian drama? XD Here's another quickie for you. And yeah, they haven't make full progress yet THEY'RE STILL FRIENDS XD Let them be adorkable for a while hahah.**

**Jay Dawn – More Xs! Yesss, don't worry they'll be a couple! (or. . . or. . . *shots) You don't ask too much, hun. :3 I'm happy you love my story. Here's another update for you~!**

**Kuuro – To answer your question; well, it's up to you if you want to imagine it that way. But I do have to say he was there reminiscing the past. Yeah, maybe a bit long. Thanks for Xs!**

**Dear readers, I've written until chapter 9! Wait for more updates in another couple of days! And there'll be a trailer fic for an upcoming series one!**

**Note : This happens before the reunion party. . . Akashi had just arrived and yeah, it's super awkward as hell.**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Seven**

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**TETSUYA**

_Do you remember, back then we held hands like nothing could stop us? We used the term best friends to crash the barricades of awkwardness, and from there we did everything – we did a lot of stuffs. Good stuffs, I mean. And we were alright to how things remained, although the urge lingered but we were too foolish that we decided we would steer clear from such matters._

_And now, growing up – we were no longer the innocent teenagers we once claimed to be. No more of the naivety, no more avoiding, but we indulge. So the urge remained; taunting, mocking, teasing, forcing. . . till I thought that it was too painful and unbearable to meet you once more. It really was. The pain of not being able to touch the pale-ish skin of yours, to nuzzle our shoulders together, to glance at you from a distance, anything. They no longer have the term of what friends – or rather, best friends – would do. I mean teenage life was okay. But doing it when you're twenty-two, God, it sounded so wrong. Like, like I would be degraded as a lovesick puppy._

_Therefore, when I came face to face countless text messages and missed calls, I knew I couldn't meet you just yet. Not when I was this afraid. My cellphone was placed elsewhere and I didn't bother to touch it, much less to look at. Was it because when your name constantly displayed on the dimly intensity screen, my breathe became ragged and panicked. I was really, really, really afraid._

_Though, what was I afraid of? You? My feelings? Us? I wasn't quite sure either but it was fear alright. And the repeating intake towards the same, old memories with you remained for four years, hence I wondered if you'd do the same._

_You were busy after all. Cambridge level and family matters aside, perhaps your otou-san had arranged you with some sort of engagement. It was possible. I'd always thought that wealthy people remained with their own community. Perhaps, your father would have this business connection and you were to marry a woman because of that._

_Arranged marriage. Somewhat, my saliva tasted bitter in my tongue as the reverie whirled around like a blinding nightmare and my chest thumped heavily, like angry punches blown towards the walls. I sighed, massaging my temples and had the other hand balled into fists._

_A child proceed to me, an innocent face of concern and cheeks painted rosy. "Is sensei okay?"_

"_Yes Aoi-chan. . . You don't have to worry about me."_

"_Okay then," the boy pursued to silence before he looked with hopeful eyes, "Can I go outside and play on the swings?"_

"_Not till three. It's still hot outside. Now finish your colouring first, go now."_

_The little boy scurried off, leaving a warm smile spreading across my face. The children gave me a fuzzy feeling, alright, to derive me with oblivion, away from the past but never to disappear._

_I groaned again once the boy was fully gone, facing headache. It seemed that the thought of you engaged bothered me so much._

_I blamed it all to Akashi-kun._

* * *

"Akashi-kun?"

There were we again; same old fast food restaurant, same seats and the same feel of the smooth and spotless table, and that same old vanilla shake which never failed to impress my taste buds. It was weird watching you flinched towards the sight of unhealthy food. Whatever. Important thing was, you were here. Face to face. You looked at me. A smirk grazed your lips, reflecting upon my own small uplift as well.

"Hn? What is it, Tetsuya? You looked. . . worried."

Hesitating, I bit my lip. Finally, the dreaded question yet to come. "Do you have. . . uh, a girlfriend?"

Your brows arched, startled by my question and there was a brief look of annoyance. "What is the meaning behind that question?"

"N-nothing. . ."

"Tetsuya. . ." Yours weren't laced with threat, but a warning. And I sat in silence, morphed with remorse and disdain but also longing with curiosity.

"I was just wondering after all. . . since, you know, it'd been four years." I mumbled the last part, shyly.

"Why? Does Tetsuya has a significant other already?"

I chuckled softly, sensing the firmness in your voice. Was it envy? Or better yet, jealousy? "Is Akashi-kun jealous?"

You smirked. "I think Tetsuya is the one being jealous here. If not, why'd bring the topic in the first place?"

I choked back my drink, fighting back the shake from spurting out. It made sense. It was obvious. Immediately, clenched fists punched the chest multiple times to sooth down the previous sufferable pain.

"Akashi-kun, you. . . you d-dolt!"

"Hn? I'm merely stating the truth." Amuse tainting the poisonous tone.

"No way!" My blush widened, spreading to the tip of my ears. "Why would I be jealous of Akashi-kun? I. . . I don't really care if you've got yourself a girlfriend!"

Ah, that stung. You felt it too, and the previous serene smile became strained and forced, you who were containing your anger.

"Hn. What do you think?"

"What do I think about what?"

"Do I have a girlfriend?"

"I. . . How do I supposed to know that?" _Geez, you're such a troublesome person to talk, _I agreed to my own thoughts.

You smiled, malicious and sly and irritable but drop dead handsome – er, I mean good-looking. There was something beneath the smile that clenched my stomach and had my mind boiled with a warning. Smooth yet secretive, dangerous, murderous – that was the kind of smile you were showing.

I huffed inwardly, wishing that I'd never asked the question. Tension hung in the air, begging to be released but both of us were feeding our ego, refusing to admit defeat. Though deep down, I knew because of my question, my life had just turned into a natural disaster.

_Kami-sama, save me from Hell._

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Hey! Sorry I haven't been updating for three days! I was out for a vacation. But that doesn't mean I procrastinate. In fact, I've written three chapters in my phone including this!**

**Earthquake! Yesterday and today, we experienced moderate earthquake. But today we received ten deaths from Singaporeans students who are still stuck on top of our sacred mountain. There are about 100 climbers and they can't go down! Poor them! It's literally freezing up there. *cries***

**Again, X for love O if you found this nonsense! Send it to the review and give me honest feedbacks!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	9. Eight

**Credits :**

**Rinfantasy - Don't worry, Akashi's POV comes in the next chapter :D**

**Akakuro Seiya - Hahaha! I know right :3 Tsuntsun Tet-chan x3**

**Scarlet Aki-chin - Heiyooo! Nice meeting you in FB xD Thanks for the Xs! I like it~! Don't worry, they will be. Soon. Huehue.**

**ShinseiShinwa - I could feel your depression! xD Sorry! Don't worry, I'll make it less awkward soon. But not now~**

**Here's a quickie! Yay! Say yay! YAYYYY!**

**Why do we need disclaimers in Fanfiction? This is fanfiction. Fiction for fandoms, duh. Anyway, only this story belongs to me. ME. MOZU THE MOCHI.**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Eight**

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**TETSUYA**

In the end, I realised I never received a proper answer from you. Witty, smart-mouthed, Cambridge level Akashi-kun. What was I thinking? I shouldn't have forget that you were always the one leading a conversation – making it somewhat like an interrogation or debate – fighting words with words, twisting, manipulating, driving me on the verge of insanity. Still, I wanted proper answers, not those witty comebacks or mockeries but a real answer to cure my curiosity, and heal that funny feeling in my chest. Instead, what you would do was to double, triple, quadruple the amount of flaming curiosity and stacked them like books I should've read before examination. You were the one, leading me to the brink of insanity.

I should've known better.

Some part might never change after all. It was your habit, and – old habits die hard, or so they said.

So that night, I couldn't rest. No, not without an answer. I tossed and turned, threw the bedsheets and experienced direct winter from the air-con. Not bothering to change the temperature, I sulked even more, troubled. Until the insomnia became worst, I repeated the harsh motion. Nothing helped. My mind was reeling with heavy question marks that seemed to send me Muay Thai kicks to the brain and I could feel my heart thumping like a drum roll from the climax of a heavy metal song.

_Do you. . . Do you have a girlfriend, Akashi-kun?_

Then I'd imagined the upwards lift of your lips, victorious and pompous; and how the crimson and royal shade glistened, icy and disastrous.

"_What do you think?"_

God damn it to Hell.

* * *

**SEIJUUROU**

I wondered why Tetsuya would suddenly ask me that particular question. My, my, you should've known me better. You knew of the outcome, and the consequences – and that the response wouldn't exist at all. But I was enjoying it, the moment I sensed the curiosity laced in your soft, shy voice and the twinkle flashing in the gorgeous blue.

Too hopeful.

And the thought of you having one caused my own to dull, darkened, becoming a glare of which I'd planned to give towards whoever that stole Tetsuya from me. After the smug response I gave out of mischief – and a good one to top it all, hah – my chest was burning like a fiery flame. . . Was this anger?

Of course, the question dawdled still – something I haven't come with a reply yet;

Do I still like you just as I would four years ago?

Do you?

Would you call this love or it would be just a habitual infatuation? Was it because we became each other's comfort, that we called this thing love?

The night was good, warm and sweet despite the incoming winter season but my eyes refused to shut and indulge into sweet dreams. I couldn't sleep. Thinking about Tetsuya often made me restless; craving to touch, to claim, to possess. The pair of baby blue eyes, half-lidded in my imagination, looking through mine with more than just affection; the alabaster white skin, smooth and eager to be claimed upon; the soft and fluffy locks waiting to be stroked and pampered – you should've known they were mine to begin with.

Mine.

So yes, to answer the questions. . . I had been madly in love. I, weakened by a former friend, was driven madly into the thing called love. I, who was once cold and disastrous – was feeling love. Why had I just noticed it by now?

I had been foolish. Too foolish. Too greedy to chase achievements yet I forgot to achieve the most important. I hadn't been a genius at all, I was still an utter fool.

Four years, my feelings never once ceased. They multiplied, turning into exasperation, impatience, hunger. . . Had I been immune to it or blinded when I rejoiced?

But let us not forget the main question that constantly repeated in mind; was there still any time to have our broken relationship mended and advanced?

You did ask me that. Perhaps you wanted to indicate that you actually had one, and it was actually a signal. Perhaps that was why you were afraid. You hesitated. Because. . . You were claimed. Someone – either a woman or man – had caught you falling and made you theirs.

My fists balled beneath my covers and I groaned out of frustration. It was just a theory, it could be false as well. But it didn't help me to stop worrying. It had been four years. . .

Was I too late?

**TO BE CONTINUED**

* * *

**Mozu : Four years issue is still there. Suspense on two chapters! Next chapter will be written thoroughly on Akashi's POV, according to Rinfantasy's request! Now before you lash at me, I just want you to know the suspense was made for a longer chapter – followed by more and more and more awkwardness! Fixing a relationship wasn't easy. It took me three to four years with my ex-boyfriend. And of course, we now sit together in class and literally being best friends again. Hah.**

**Writing this is half based on my experience as well. So, that's why I'm rather infatuated at this story because I could picture myself. I'm awkward. Heh heh.**

**After the next update, I will alter a little focus on a preview fic. As much as I want to focus the preview in this chapter, I thought it'll be messy. So yeah, it'll be like a trailer fic for something that'll be ultra long! I'm chasing 50 chapters. Stay tune, it's called Boundaries Between Bond and yes, AkaKuro for sure! And it's rated M :D**

**X for love, O for hate.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	10. Nine

**Credits :**

**Rinfantasy – Yeah, true that! Honesty is a difficult thing to do *cries because of experiences* I hope you're not depressed because of this though. . . *pats head***

**Veiled Curiosity – Maiii, thanks! XD**

**Scarlet Aki-chin – Oh yesss, about the fanfic I'm going to post. It'll be on my other account; Mira Bellrose. Don't ask me why I have two accounts, I just feel like it XD**

**Anon – Aww, don't feel sad! It's not meant to be sad. . . Idk, maybe *mindblown* Anyway, I'll try if I can increase by 2k or 3k :3 Reviewer's request is important~!**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Nine**

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**SEIJUUROU**

"You're to advance degree."

That was what my father had suggested, or rather ordered me to do. I scowled, sensing the intention he was going to display afterwards. Father was always like that; filled with secrets, cunning reasons yet selfish and disturbing. So hastily (but of course, I was composed and calm), I gave him an immediate response through a cold tone;

"Alright, father. But I refuse to go overseas again. Let me choose my own college, and this time. . . in Tokyo." I pressed the location, to show my determination of not admitting defeat. If you're an Akashi, you know no defeat in whatever battle you are in, that was for sure.

The older Akashi arched his eyebrows, startled at the request I presented to him. Meanwhile, I gave him a smile genuinely showed pride and victory, and something out of sarcasm saying, _I'm old enough not to be your puppet_. He wasn't pleased, much to my pleasure.

"And what is your reason?"

"I feel comfortable here, and easily I could visit _okaa-san's _grave."

"I see. . . So it wasn't because of that Kuroko?"

The lump in my throat suddenly felt larger, and I swallowed bitterly, albeit harshly. Hence, my own mismatched eyes turned into a deadly glare and his wasn't a bad throwback either but there was an amused glint flashing in his eyes. He must be glad to see his own son suffer. Imbecilic old man.

Fuming, I left the spacious office space and crashed the large oak doors harshly, steaming with what you could call embarrassment and anger.

_So father knew, and all this time – was he keeping me away from Tetsuya?_

My back came in contact with the strong wood, and I could feel the ache pulsating on my temples. A groan escaped my lips, and all I could feel was the turmoil of anger still released like wisps of smoke. Unintentionally, I had myself calling for your number.

* * *

"You looked depressed. What happened?"

For a second, I thought I'd been dwelling with wrath, the next I was actually visiting your kindergarten. The pallid blue in your eyes was captivating enough to have my anger steamed away and disappear. A few seconds of just meeting you, I felt at ease again and relaxed. I couldn't care less about the kids playing and running and jumping across the wild field.

Still, you probably had seen – and you took note - towards my face which had been a bright scarlet shade till the tip of my ears from my fumes. Judging by your expressions, you weren't pleased. There was a brief look of fear and a morph of shame but it dissipated once you had your fingers curled towards my left cheek. The contact came like snow on burning coal, dissing away the heat until comfort took over me. Your eyes never left mine, the pair focused as if searching, reading. . .

"I can't figure out anything," you retreated back and I was disappointed by the loss of coolness, frowning and sulking followed afterwards. "I don't know what's up with you so can you tell me now, Akashi-kun?" So you'd been trying to read me – but an Akashi wasn't weak enough to display any real emotions. Did you forget?

"It's okay, Tetsuya. . ." I chuckled, showing an amused mien so at least you'd be at ease.

"What happened?"

_Should I be honest? You'll be worried. Then again, you don't like me to keep secrets. _"I'm going to advance my studies to degree level," I told you earnestly.

And indeed, I was correct about you being worried. There was a conflicted look briefly crossed your face, and a long, heavy sigh.

"Hey, don't worry," coaxing, "I'm just going to T University."

"T. . . You mean Tokyo University? But. . ."

"Yes, I got approval from Father."

"I see. . . Good then."

"Good about what?"

"No – I mean. . . I mean. . . It's g – gah, never mind."

_If we'd be lovers, I'd have you by my arms right now. _"Tetsuya. . ." it was a warning tone, me lacing my voice with a slight growl and you flinched, baffled.

"I'm just glad that we'd still be able to meet each other. There's no need to send letters or wait until Christmas. Not that we'd been doing such things for the past years. . . But now that we're here together, I'm happy, Akashi-kun." I can't believe you were be able to say it with such peaceful eyes, and the air surrounded you was tranquil – as if a cat satisfied with the amount of heat it received when it wanted to sleep – and my imagination ran wild about you purring.

What was I thinking back then?

Right now, you were captivating enough to make me swallowing hard – and to make an Akashi nervous and sweaty and weak-kneed?

In the depths of my mind, I knew I couldn't wait long enough.

You looked at me and smiled, and returned to the aggravated group of kids, who by now were fighting. I could only watched from afar, the visage of you treating the fellow children and deep inside, I wanted that eyes, soft and gentle and caring, to be directed towards my own cold and flaring pair.

* * *

Father was quick enough to make it looked like he was impatient. He'd almost complete the arrangements and soon enough, I found out I would start my classes within two weeks. Father was always like that; cruel and selfish, worse than me when it comes to dictatorship. If I was to be Hitler, he'd be a Tartar ruler – fitting the definition of evil. Perhaps, because the term Akashi was an epitome of perfection, and neither he wanted me to be some kind of a weakling, or better yet, a minion of some sorts. He wanted us to be amongst the highest, the one who'd trampled, the one that grabbed power.

So, I glared (the dirtiest look I'd be able to give) at the registration letter bitterly, tasting a sour tang in my mouth. _Bussiness and Management, just as I thought. _A course filled with petty lies and manipulation, of course Father would want that.

Then, after degree, he'd be ranting on about MBA. I couldn't care less. In my own mind, I had imagined a life as a husband – and it wasn't some random woman that I'd marry. No, I'd have the maya blue pools for my own, giving me looks of affection and love and have that slim figure wrapped beneath mine every night –

Oh Seijuurou, what are you thinking? Surely, you know that wouldn't be possible. It wasn't logical. Tetsuya was just a friend until now, and I knew by now it was already too late.

Wait, since when have I started becoming pessimistic? An Akashi gets what he wants, that's for sure.

. . . Alright, I'm not sure.

My mind was literally in confusion. And there was only one person to blame; Kuroko Tetsuya. Sweet, torturous little devil. . .

* * *

So, I'd come with a brilliant – although it seemed devilish enough – plan. It was perfect, I thought. Then, only then, I wouldn't have my mind tortured with so many perturbed reveries and thoughts, and depression. It was the only way I could soothe my mind from drawing into manic conclusions.

And it became a habit; of reaching phone and dialling your number straight away. It all seemed too familiar now, too easy – no more awkward thoughts (of course, we still are. . . a bit.) or occasional waits. My fingers did the work before my brain could register the situation.

That was when I had my inner monologue went broken when your voice, a bit sleepy, appeared from the other line.

"Yes, Akashi-kun?"

"You're coming with me," I said too hastily. Sensing your confusion from the line, I explained, "You're going to attend degree as well."

"W-what? Akashi-kun. . . What did you do?!"

"Pick your course, I'll email you the link. . . –"

"Akashi –"

"Then, we'll send the registration form together –"

"AKASHI –"

_Kami. _That was the first time I'd heard you really shouted, and the loud shriek shrilled against my eardrums. For a second, I was dazed and awfully shocked but I shrugged it off, swallowing hard.

Huffing, I said almost apologetically, "I'm sorry, Tetsuya. . . I –"

"Akashi-kun, if you feel lonely, just say so. . ."

"Oka – what?"

"You're lonely, aren't you? Is that why you want me to join you in the uni?"

"You've got it wro –"

"Look Akashi-kun, I'm happy with my work. Therefore, I refused to join any classes or whatsoever. But I can visit you at times, I mean it's not that far anyway," I could hear the smile in your lips, and it had my face heated up in an instant.

The line went dead after that. But I was nowhere near happy. . . or amused, or. . . I don't know. It felt heavy, my chest. But at the same time, I was also. . . hopeful.

_Kami. Was I. . . rejected?_

**TO BE CONTINUED**

* * *

**Mozu : Bahahahaha! What did I just wrote?! It's 11PM, maybe that's why. Haha. I've been beta-ing my friend's fanfic as well. Yeah. . . I'm just exhausted.**

**Akashi : Mozuuuuuu. . . *warning tone***

**Mozu : Erm, erm. . . Don't worry Sei-chan – I mean, Akashi-sama. . . *looks at the approaching redhead* Mama mia, don't hit me!**

**Kuroko : *sigh***

**Mozu : X FOR LOVE, GIVE AKASHI LOTS OF HUGS MMKAY?! AAAAAHHH *sounds of chainsaw coming***

**-Mozu The Mochi**


	11. Ten

**Credits :**

**Rinfantasy**

**Veiled Curiosity**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**Akakuro Seiya**

**Guest**

**Jay Dawn**

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**Fact of this story : The author completely forgot of the time setting, thus she puts random seasons in every chapters. Lol.**

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Ten**

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**TETSUYA**

You know, when you thought that you lost the oddness and tense air that had been a border between someone – you're definitely wrong.

Or perhaps time made friendships worse than any circumstances could get.

Four months.

Autumn flew and came in winter, much colder and drew the hectic city with ashen shades and silvery drops. Kids were much happier, because they'd be able to play with snow as if it was a pile of blankets. But the weather was torturous, settling me with a fit of sneezes and runny nose that the children were barely able to contain their giggles and laughter. Troublesome.

For the past four months as well, I hadn't been noticing a patch of the supposedly noticeable red hair, not even a shadow, not even a figure. And an uneasy feeling dawned upon my chest as the thought of my promise wasn't yet fulfilled. _Easier said than done_, I scowled, _Akashi-kun would be very angry._

_Or upset._

No calls, no rendezvous, no gifts, no pictures, no emails, nothing. I guess you were really angry after all; for denying the university, for denying you, for the broken deal. The promise. Oh _Kami_, I felt terrible.

If you'd be here, what would you say? Would you even say a word? Would you even meet me?

"I'm sorry. . ." I'd said it aloud, and inwardly to myself. _And towards you._

This was difficult, to be honest. Such relationship was complicated. And what did I said about being tense? The bond we had was like a Ferris wheel, going up and down and up and down, and repeated the motion again and again until it fully comes to an end.

This situation was of no better.

* * *

"Kise-kun?"

I saw the blond emitting his charm from afar, looking as radiant as ever (that it hurts my eyes, not that I'll ever admit it out loud anyway). Kise never truly changed, handsomely charming by appearance but truly annoying at heart. His childishness wasn't just. . . something I could cope with.

And childish he did. Once he saw me, he had that sunny aura surrounding him and waved cheerfully. I huffed, utterly embarrassed.

"Kurokocchii!" The arms came as an embrace, and I successfully avoided with a victorious smirk.

"Kise-kun, what are you doing around –"

T University. Wasn't it the place where you'd be studying? Unless you. . .

"Oh yeah, I'm expanding my studies!" The blond exclaimed proudly, like it was his biggest achievement in life.

"With. . . Akashi-kun?"

"Not really. I do often see him at times, but he mostly hangs out with Midorimacchii and Murasakibaracchii."

_Oh._

I swallowed a rather lump nervously, and gosh, was my palms always this sweaty. Had he been that disappointed? Had I really let him down? Slowly, the sense of awkwardness crept back and I couldn't bring myself to see you again.

_I'm sorry, Akashi-kun._

**TO BE CONTINUED**

* * *

**Mozu: Well, I'm back! Miss me? Aaa? Aa? It's been a month, and I have a test last week. Aaaand as usual, our class went into trouble. The story goes a bit like this ; a classmate asked for a peek of the Physics paper from our practical teacher before the actual exam and yeah, the teacher showed him. Then, I found out the paper was passed around by that teacher to all the students. I, too, had taken a peek of the diagrams but not the questions (just the first question though which is just practically asking to define Hooke's law). Then after the school ended, the whole class found out SOMEONE had actually reported to the other teachers. I'm not saying we did a good thing, everyone knew it was wrong and we kinda regret it. Some even didn't touch the paper. But everyone was going to get scolded by the principal.**

**I'm just angry at my classmate who report it. First of all, the practical teacher do that to gain our trust and wants to help us cause the whole class. But that friend of mine, UGH HE HAS NO EQ AT ALL. When our Maths teacher was being sarcastic, it puts everyone in a bad mood and he was laughing and smiling. Oh well, he's always a bit weird but now he's a jerk.**

**Oh well, X for love O for hate! I'll update next week with a longer one and no POV chapter. Heh heh.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	12. Eleven

**Credits :**

**Rinfantasy - I know xD Well, you'll see later.**

**Scarlet Aki-chin - Hello! I miss you so much! Thanks~! Haha**

**Akakuro Seiya - I hope you don't stay speechless!**

**ShinseiShinwa - Husband?! xD AHAHA THAT'LL BE GREAT. I can imagine him like "Honey why are you hanging with them and not me" scene hahaha! Here's the next chappie btw!**

**Visitor From AO3 - Endure? Nah, I just cried. It hurts real bad to have your mommy teacher scolding you. *weeps***

**Jay Dawn - You and your great ideas! Thank you thank you thank you! This chapter is thus dedicated to you :3 Anyway yeah. They do have been separated for four years. Wait I just realized I've been using the number four quite frequently xD**

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**NOTE : Just a quick update! Short and simple. And thank you Jay Dawn for sparking me with a brilliant idea. *cackles like a hen***

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Eleven**

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"_Okay," I said. "Just a normal afternoon and two normal people."_

_She nodded. "And so...hypothetically, if these two people likes each other, what would it take to get the stupid guy to kiss the girl, huh?"_

_"Oh..." I felt like one of Apollo's sacred cows-slow, dumb, and bright red. "Um..." _

― _Rick Riordan, The Last Olympian_

* * *

From a distance, a silhouette hid behind the bricked wall, afraid and shaken. From a distance, the figure created gaps between the man and himself. From a distance, the baby blue chips stared longingly toward the man with bright scarlet tufts and mismatched eye chatting and idling about with some other people. Kuroko gulped, his hand holding his throat slightly stronger than before.

Was he envious? No wait, that wasn't the right word. Was he jealous? Maybe. Slightly. A lot more than he should, yeah he was.

And Kuroko had been noticing the loyal friend of Akashi as well; familiar green hair and cladded with spectacles. He wasn't amused about it either, and from a bird eye's view – which, if Akashi knew better the sight of the noticeable baby blue hair was obvious – but damn Kuroko was good with his talent of being invisible – and said stalker was sulking and having his arms crossed like a child about to throw a tantrum.

The latter had thought of numerous things. He had to do a lot; to talk, to apologize and maybe even to give the redhead a vicious shake and a punch and afterwards would come the occasionally _You could've called! _sort of thing. But Kuroko stayed put, and found himself staring and staring, not being able to wake from his trance.

Well, it was his own fault anyway.

A step backwards and the blunette had retreated. He had enough. Just by watching the redhead had ceased part of his concerns though it didn't meant he was no longer perturb. Yet, he felt the oddness crawled onto him like a nightmare and he shrugged involuntarily. The blunette went to find vending machine, just to clear from his evil thoughts.

"What am I even doing here. . .?" grumbled the short male in a soft mutter, feeling his frustration rising even more. Well, he had hoped the redhead would be in a different condition – but of what? He wasn't sadist enough to enjoy the redhead being a lone wolf. But it was painful to watch his former close friend having his own circle whilst he was the one. . . alone.

"Kuro-chin?"

_Kuro-chin?_

_That nickname. . ._

"Mu –Murasakibara-kun?"

"What are you doing here?"

"Um. . ."

Shit. What was he supposed to tell? _I'd came here to stalk on someone because I want to see him suffering or not (?). Yeah, what kind of answer is that?! _The blunette argued with his own mind, and in reality he was scrunching his brows and pulled his lips into a frown.

The tall – tallest – man was not amused.

"You're going to meet Aka-chin, aren't you?"

" –Wait, no. . ."

"Should I call him here –"

"No, I beg you please, don't do that!" His cheeks had been streaked in hot crimson shades across the pale skin. And _Kami _knows why he was sweating as if he'd been doing a three hours workout. "Just please. . . I'm not ready to meet him yet."

The purple-haired man had his brows furrowed. "Why?"

"It's. . . it's just complicated. . ."

Kuroko was sure afterward he had heard a bored scoff, "If you're that scared to face him, why don't you just give him a call? I'm sure Aka-chin will sound less scary." He had taken out a Coke from the vending machine, and with that he shrugged his hand and left the blunette glued onto the spot.

"Should I give it a try. . .?" His face reddened once more and he bit his lower lip hard, embracing the embarrassment toward the suggestion.

Ugh Tet-chan, why do you need to be so complicated?! Watching the two was a pain in the ass, and I couldn't help but felt unease as well.

Sweet, innocent Tet-chan. Someday I hope that you weren't that naïve.

* * *

**TETSUYA**

"_Hello Akashi-kun. . ."_

"_How have you been doing?"_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Hey, let's meet up and talk again!"_

"_Akashi-kun, I kinda miss you."_

Not that I know of, I accidentally pressed _send _toward the last message instead of _delete._

**TO BE CONTINUED**

* * *

**Mozu : You can guess the mysterious POV came from who. It's easy. Haha and then I'll explain the details later! Today, school sucks. Principal came in our class for the second time (first time was last year, also a terrible discipline case from the boys) and our Chemistry teacher had been calling us fools for not being able to answer the **_**easy **_**test questions. I had to do 100 jumping jacks in a fasting month! Now I have a stomach ache and I can't drink nor eat until 6PM.**

**Shameless advertising! Check out my new published story; Love Me for Thirty Days now! It's rated M and I'll know you'll like it cause chapter 2 will have smut in it! Eh ehh eeeh *waggle eyebrows***

**X for love, O for hate! Next chapter comes in Akashi's POV!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	13. Twelve

**AND THE COMMENT AWARD GOES TO :**

**ShinseiShinwa – Hahaha disciplining a teacher xD that's like so rare!**

**Rinfantasy – Here it is. Akashi's POV today myeahh**

**Visitor – I'm fine **** I'm just feeling guilty for not being a good student U_U **

**Jay Dawn – you. I'm worried about replying your review cause it's too long! xD that's what makes it unique I guess. Hahaha keep on singing! I'm actually enjoying the lyrics you gave me. I was thinking of including some into the story. MAYBE I WILL –le gasp- cause you just know how to find a good song. *****。ヾ****(****｡****ｖ****｡****)****ﾉﾞ*********。**

**lilmymyshem – Why thank you! *bows***

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Twelve**

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**AKASHI**

I'm smiling.

For the umpteenth time, a few colleagues had to throw me a glance obviously showing frustration, or some with the agitated mien because of that upward curve donned onto my visage. The curl on the lips, the butterflies in the pit of my stomach, the little sparks igniting in my chest like a little kid visiting Disneyland, the rushing adrenaline; they had yet to happen when I was in the midst of friends, discussing about serious matters.

Why, it was your fault, of course.

Either way, my head just wanted to determine that. Due to the excitement, I was also in the most uncomfortable position. I wanted to run. I wanted to chase the trails away to your apartment. I wanted to meet you verbally and my throat itching to talk, to mock and tease, to laugh.

"_Akashi-kun, I kinda miss you."_

Sometimes, simple words are strong enough to make one demented and thirsty for that particular attention. Or perhaps, the bubbly feeling that sunk deep had bloomed into something much sweeter. Ours began with a simple thing that held no importance to what we are now; basketball. Yet, our friendship bloomed farther, and now we were chasing trails, running in circles.

I could confirm that you never had meant to send the text message to me. You being blunt was an extraordinary occurrence, perhaps a miracle itself. _This _was a slip of a finger, yet the accident worked marvellous.

At least, you'd have me by your door tonight.

Yet, I was seated in the farthest location from the lecturer, my feet and soul restless and aching to move. Blame the university's system for creating schedules up to 10PM. If I were free, I'd flee as fast as lightning.

My lips turned into a smile once more, and a deep but low chuckle rumbled deep in my throat. Someone must have noticed me again, and in a distance, I could barely register the words – followed by a string of profanities, it seemed – thrown toward me;

"Will you stop that?!"

I should've stopped scaring people.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

* * *

**Mozu : My handphone was confisticated. *cries* I can't type through phone anymore!**

**More of the shameless advertising! xD Check out Deepper's The Devil and I! I will have a longer adaptation toward that story soon. And I'll make it like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. Check out my other sad story, Love Me For Thirty Days!**

**PS, there's a reason why I made this chapter super short.**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	14. Thirteen

**Beautiful reviewers :**

**Nesrine**

**Rinfantasy**

**SharuruPon-789nyan**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**Jay Dawn**

**Deepper**

**AyakiStory**

**luannacoelhod**

**Daygon Yuuki**

* * *

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Thirteen**

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**SEIJUUROU**

I think we're both idiots. Sad to admit that, but I guess we really are. We've been idiots since junior high, since the very first moment we knew of our feelings. We're fools who thought we're just some ignorant people, but in truth we forced ourselves to ignore the obvious details. We really are idiots for staying in the similar spot, shrouded in the pits of shadows, for many years. And I'm starting to wonder how we managed – how we survived – throughout the years of our idiocy. Pitiful, scared idiots who were bound to no progress in our lives because only idiots remained in the same position for years.

Four years happened to be a trademark symbol for both of us now. I saw you cringed each time the digit reminded you, thinking back about the chances we slipped off in the twelvemonths before that. And I, too, dreaded what fools we were to take notice of others. That we thought we knew what other might be thinking, but what we actually predicted, but did others really bore a threat of disgust seeing us as more than friends? Four was, indeed, always an unfortunate digit. Even to the Chinese folklore, four brings to a definition of death. Well, does this means our messed up bond was already in the brink of death? Did the chances had been fully disappeared, and hope no longer ceased for both of us?

Perhaps. Well, all I could think of was our fools, selfish selves. Come to think of it, even Daiki and Ryouta had been courting since the final year of high school. Hate to admit it, but even the people we deemed as common-sense-lacking idiots turned out to be the courageous ones we met. And we remained in the shadows of such community, after all. Including me, Akashi Seijuurou.

And now, should I be an idiot and left the door unattained and pretend like nothing happened – becoming a coward I always was? Or should I finally put up a bravado and knock the damn door? Should I do it even if it was 3AM, looking like a lost puppy by your doorstep. Even though I knew you were sleeping, I knew you'd be mad. I knew you would show me that confusion – albeit adorable – in the cherubic, lily-white visage, truly reflecting in those maya blue pools of yours.

I huffed, a headache greeting my head like a stone would land upon and crack my skull. Still, I finally made my decision. I won't be turning back anymore. There won't be anymore years spent hiding in our pitiful secrets. No more of the act of a timid lion who stole secret glances and hand restraining from chaste touches back before our dreaded four years. A changed man I'd be. I pulled against my bravado, my hand clenching against the fabric of my clothing as I stared at the mahogany ahead looking as if the door was mocking me.

Finally, when my chest felt like the wild ripples of storm turned into a calm blanket of blue ocean, that I started knocking despite the distinctive quivers of my right hand. Swallowing, my mind reverted back to the choice of running away, but my pride kept me at my bay and I waited upon your arrival. I waited patiently – but patience turned into a longing fear that made me swallow back my pride, I took a step back. _Maybe this is a bad idea after all_, I bit my lip nervously. _Maybe I should leave. . . _Yet, they once called me an emperor for a reason. It seemed like whatever king-like persona I had back then was thrown into a drain, gone was the emperor people once familiar with. Perhaps. I'm confused myself. I was about to leave, but the door suddenly fling open and almost crashed against my back, only to crash against the wall instead. Flinching, I looked back to see a yawning blunette. True to my words, you looked startled as hell.

"Akashi. . .?"

"A-Ah. . . Tetsuya. . ."

"W-What are you doing here?" You stammered amidst not cleared visions of a certain person I knew you really didn't want to meet at this point.

Judging from your looks, I was throwing away a conflicted expression. Mortified of my own self, I scratched the back of my head, sweat rolling like crystalline beads down to my chin as I attempted to avoid the other one's gaze. I swallowed the last bit of his pride, and an awkward hushed tone came out from his voice, "I. . ." I gulped, "I just wanted to see you."

"Around this hour?"

"Yeah. . . No. . . I don't know. . ." I chuckled awkwardly, "I'm just being an idiot right now. I'll leave –"

"Hey, Akashi-kun – wait!" In cue with me starting to retreat, you leaped forward quick enough to grab hold of my wrist, a sign showing me to stay put. So, I did. But I casted you a gaze, not that I meant it, but it was one feigning a slight annoyance and had you pulled away instantly. I waited, again.

I guess you were just sleepy. Perhaps, you think this was just a miraculous dream. That this wasn't reality at all, and you'd wake up to see yourself tucked in between sheets once more. . . Or, I could've been better off wrong because there was determination in your eyes. You spoke clearly, the message hitting in my nerves as fast as the way you held my wrist. "Will you be an idiot for once and stay?" But when he realised the words were, in fact, mortifying he immediately backed away and closed the door shut, again placing barricades in between. For a split second, I was really flabbergasted upon your actions but I heard you muttering jumbled up words of remorse, I chuckled.

"Let me in, Tetsuya."

"No."

"But you wanted me to stay?"

". . . Yes."

I snorted out a tiny laugh.

Still awkward, but in a good way.

* * *

**TETSUYA**

What do you feel when a person you had been wanting to avoid – but at the same time, a really precious person – suddenly intruded into your house in the three-quarters of night? Just as you made yourself comfortable, and the whole scenario was a perfect fit for something far more better than casual banter (who'd come in the late nights to do nothing but. . . w-well?) but we made no progress at all. I threw you an odd glance, and in fact, the machismo you conveyed now melted off. A tensed air with no volume seemed to suffocate the two of us, and I was beginning to fidget despite your presence.

"Just. . . continue this tomorrow, please. . ."

"But. . ."

"Akashi-kun, I appreciate your presence here but it's 3AM and I still need my sleep."

"Well then," he trailed off, much to my curiosity and I threw away a questioning look with my eyebrows furrowed in a manner similar to a cautious cat. "How about a sleepover?" And God damn, was he winking? What a mischief, I groaned in despair despite the bubblegum shade spreading across my cheeks. Sometimes, I was thinking that you'd be a perfect fit for a master of awkwardness. Still, I began to laugh. Was it worth a night, repeating back to our high school memories and ease our nostalgia together?

Well, at least it was better than the two cowards I once knew we really were.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : I'm crying because I'm not satisfied at my progress. Somehow, I had difficulties updating this and Love Me For Thirty Days. It was 3AM when I wrote this in my phone, and I was panicking because I haven't update for months. For that, I truly apologise to you readers for this inconvenience. I'm still having the lack of ideas to update chapter 9 of LMFTD. I hope it's worth the wait for LMFTD, but I knew for sure this story does not deserve the wait. *cries***

**X for love, O for hate?**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2015)**


	15. Fourteen

**Credits :**

**Rinfantasy**

**CheshireSN**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**fanaticz**

**Catalina Luna Moon**

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Fourteen**

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**TETSUYA**

It's. . . It's warm.

Oh God, why?

Usually, even with four blankets plus a jacket, nothing can beat the freezing temperature of the AC (back then, I've lost the remote to ease down the temperature I've set to a full blast). However, tonight, I could feel the warmth seeping from my back and it's easing me to sleep faster than before.

But then, I felt arms.

Arms circling around my waist, and my back actually leaning against somebody's torso.

Somebody. . .

Somebody!

"AKASHI!" I yelled toward you, my face beet red and my temperature increased like a boiling water. I mean, who wouldn't be that embarrassed to find a person who was supposed to be in awkward terms with you suddenly popped out beside when you're sleeping oh-so-soundly.

Not that you would actually care, right Akashi-kun? You'd threw me that victorious smirk toward me because it's an achievement to sleep beside me without my consent.

But it's warm, though. . .

Anyway, you really did have done it. That smirk on your face. . . Sometimes, I'd like to wipe them off clean or perhaps, perhaps. . . Caught you off-guard ―

What am I thinking?!

I'm blushing again. Obviously, it's not a good thing for me.

"Feeling warm?" You questioned with a glint of mischief.

I didn't respond. I'm still in my shocked state, repenting on what sins I have done. Pallid blue eyes glared against your mismatched ones, and your smirk shifted into a low grin. "Hey Tetsuya, I'm sorry."

Still, the silence hung in the air.

"Tetsuya. . ." you wailed pathetically, desperate for my attention that perhaps you had missed so much. "I just. . . I missed hugging you."

Still, no response.

But it's not because I'm angry or anything. No, no, no. The anger had long dissipated into thin air. But the scarlet streak of my blush remained, and never had I felt my heart melting so much. The warmth you gave didn't only touch against my skin, but it touched my heart.

I turned toward you ― I could see the confusion suddenly popped out from your expression ― and out of nowhere, I pulled you to an embrace. My arms circled against your neck, from a far distance I inched myself closer. We remained like that for mere seconds, and I pushed you away gently with a soft gaze.

"Happy?" I asked softly.

But it was now your turn to be rendered speechless.

It was never meant to be a payback, to be honest.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : Odd, I like it when this is just short snippets. Hahahaha! Long one coming, adios!**

**X for love, O for hate!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2016)**


	16. Fifteen

**REVIEWS :**

**otakufire1028**

**13590anime**

**fanz**

**ShinseiShinwa**

**Rinfantasy**

**Saeyoung's Waifu**

**XD**

**Warnings : Mention of homophobia**

* * *

**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Fifteen**

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**SEIJUUROU**

Was it the rain?

Perhaps, the embrace you recently gave me? It felt nice, it felt wonderful. It felt familiar, and it struck me with an odd feeling. The warmth still lingered, and it brought me a sense of nostalgia to how you used to cling to me during high school ― well, sometimes. Mostly when it was just the two of us.

Somehow, it reminded me of the days we used to have; just us two. Hanging around at some part of the school hidden because you had always adored being alone. Typical lone wolf Tetsuya. A moment of silence. A moment of hushed laughter and tossed basketballs and hands held together.

But once in a while, we'd heard other voices. And I'd often looked at you, stared into your eyes; they wavered and glossed, your breath caught up as if you were gasping and I instantly knew ― you were afraid.

You were afraid of being caught. You were afraid to make it far. You were afraid of how the community will mess us both.

I didn't. You did.

But it brought me my own fear as well. I don't want to end up losing you just because I insisted on doing something worth more. More than just to hold hands, more than a short embrace in the moments of victory during our games. More than laughter, and shared secrets and trust that we built.

Back then, I wondered how it felt like kissing you.

Was it sweeter than honey? Was it fun like games? Was it tingling like tickles on your stomach? I never knew that day, and though I kissed multiple women back in my old university, I still longed for your lips, Tetsuya.

Yours.

The way you would pout when disappointment met you, the way your lips thinned into the sincerest smile I'd ever witness, the way you licked your lips when you put your focus a hundred percent in your play.

Everything about you, I had always. . . always desired to have you.

Do you remember when we were almost caught? But rumours will always be rumours, Tetsuya, and the one about us hung around for weeks. The girls had been so heartbroken, and the boys ― weren't slightly amused. The teachers tried to ignore, but once in a while, it went passed their ears and they would gave us, you, the stares as well. Just not as much as the wretched students who took the glory of gossips. Because that had always been the purpose of their lives, those losers.

Everywhere you went ― yes, I have always been watching ― there would be eyes. Eyes pried against your small, lithe figure as you made your way dreadfully to your own homeroom. And the girls, _Kami_, the girls would talk behind your back like you were nothing.

"_Is it true they're dating?"_

"_I heard Kuroko's the one insisting."_

"_Ugh, gay? That's disgusting. . . I mean, does he even deserve __―__"_

"_Damn, and here I was about to confess to Akashi-kun. Way to go, freak. . ."_

Words could be a lethal weapon. Words were brutal, cruel killers. Syllable by syllable, stabbing your heart and stinging your heart with a poison you knew could never found its own elixir. Words pained you, and you lost the game that day because you broke down in tears, me as a witness.

You said you couldn't handle the pain any longer.

"_Sei. . . Please, stop them. . ."_ you were a sobbing mess, and you buried your face beneath your sleeves. I embraced you, tight and strong, wishing that the pain would go away. You returned my gesture, which was at least nice.

It was warm.

That was our final hug. . .

I whispered to your ear, stroking the blue tufts ― I could smell a faint scent of vanilla from your hair, tickling my nostrils but I couldn't care less. _"Alright, Tetsuya. . . I'll do it. . . I'll do it. . ."_

It was a heavy feeling. Even if it does not means losing you, it seems like it. Losing a part of something we could have achieved. The chances, I mean.

Back then, I wished we had fought harder. Daiki and Ryouta did, because even if they seemed, for the lack of a better word, wild bunch of idiots but they had better guts than we do.

I could fight.

I could protect you better.

But I. . . didn't.

Here I was, inside your apartment, and longing for more of your body heat. Breaking from my reverie, and sipping from my newly brewed coffee, I found myself asking the question that had filled my mind for lots of time now;

"Tetsuya."

"Y-Yeah?" You looked up from a book you had been scribbling whilst leaning against the island counter, looking adorably alarmed if that was ever possible, "What do you need, Akashi-kun?"

"You think we could have been more. . . four years ago?"

You gulped, fairly disturbed by my question. I could totally understand that. The memories were not exactly pleasant, but it was there. It was real, and it was like clear like any other sunny days in summer. Lowering your gaze back to the book, I saw the faint blush creeping to your cheeks. "I'm not so sure. . . But never mind that, Akashi-kun," you paused and gazed directly at me, pallid blue striking and piercing, "What matters is now."

There it was, the soft smile caressing your face. I found myself unable to resist my own, my lips curling upwards and I laughed with sheer amusement.

"You really are something now," I breathed in between my laughs. You quirked an eyebrow, arms akimbo to your hips.

"Is that supposed to be a good thing?"

I grinned back, "It sure is."

It was true.

Back then, we could have done something.

But what matters now, are we doing something at this point to make our relationship work?

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : A few more chapters lol**

**Why not try reading my Victuri lololol**

**Anyway I know this is like short as heck, but it has always meant to be short.**

**X FOR LOVE O FOR HATE**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2016)**


	17. Sixteen

**CREDITS :**

**Guest**

**Daddy Victor**

**AyakiStory**

**D.A. Rinni**

**NOTE : This story will finish in another four chapters! And then, a heavy editing process will be done! Yay me! Also, stay tune for my remake of The Broken and The Damned!**

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**The Push And Pull Relationship**

**Sixteen**

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**TETSUYA**

Damn.

Damn.

I know, it's very rare to hear me cursing.

But trust me, I'm doing this in a very silent and polite manner.

Damn.

You know, you're full of surprises; Firstly, coming to my house directly around 3AM ― I mean, who does that?! And a week after, a week full of nothingness between us, and suddenly you gave me a call ― between that muffled laughter of yours, at first I am so confused. And then the dreadful thing happened.

You asked.

As in, I mean, I would practically be alright if we were to go somewhere so. . . private. But what were you thinking inviting me to a class party?!

You remember back then, you remember how we were treated. And you don't deserve to get all the hate because I was at fault ― because I was too scared to even let you go, and I always felt that it was right being beside you. . . It's just. . . I never expected to develop those bubbly feelings in me.

And it's wrong.

Because you heard what they said.

Seijuurou, please. . . I am nothing when compared to you. And you have the right to have someone else, someone better.

That. . . That was what I want to say since a long, long time ago.

That was four years ago. But I didn't. And I was a fool, and I let you get dragged along in this world with a twisted, close-minded perception.

But in the end, it was pointless anyway since you ended up leaving me.

Haha, no. . . I'm sorry for bringing it up.

Anyway, here's a full story of what happened as I accepted his invite somehow.

Four years ― it was not a short gap of time. A long period of separation was bound to lead to some changes, to anything per se. And maybe, I hoped, a change in the acceptance of some trivial matters ― cough, cough.

So, our old classmates (mostly coming from the party girls) chose a nice sushi restaurant that served large private rooms fit for around thirty people. You seemed to blend in with most of them, Armani shirts and sunglasses, usual bangs combed to the back and revealed your prominent jaws even more better. And here I was, in a simple tweed and a coat (it rained several hours ago, and it was kind of cold).

I tried glancing to the girls, much taller and confident and well-dressed with cosmetics and perfume hanging in the air, the men who were once cheeky boys who did pranks to teachers now had broader shoulders, sleeker, smarter.

Lowering my head, I felt the need to leave but well, I felt your hand circled over my forearm and gave me an assuring squeeze. And maybe it was my mistake to look up, reflecting my own gaze to your, somewhat softened gaze, and my face went several shades darker.

_Don't look at me that way, or else they might. . ._

Their stares lingered, but not the kind of venomous ones I thought would've shown up like last time. Now, theirs were observant and oddly, expectant. And I want to know what majority of them was thinking ― I thought the matter would not rise within our little reunion.

It did.

It's just. . . I'm embarrassed.

"Sooo, Sei-kun. . ." one of the girls asked when we finally had ourselves seated ― squished between each other and battling our ways to beer and a handful of rolls and shrimp-stuffed mix, ootoro and so on; she seemed to purr upon asking the question, tongue rolling to add a dramatic effect to your name and her eyes showed a certain level of curiosity, but obviously she seemed to be amused, "How are things between Tetsu-kun, hm?"

I heard you choked, despite being several seats away from you (that was actually my condition upon coming here), and as if cautiously, I heard the small respond. ". . . Nothing much."

"Eeeh, are you sure?"

"Yeah. . ."

Another one popped in; "Aw come on, you know we don't mind anymore."

"I have the right to choose not to answer, and I shall choose it that way."

"Cold as always, hm?"

There was an air of silence, but eventually, everyone was bound to get drunk ― and well, like any kind of party, it became normal.

Only that, I excused myself early and proceeded to leave. They weren't one to mind anyway, they weren't my friends ― and even with a change, everything was bound to have a particular remnants of sameness.

It was indeed cold, a different kind of chill, and I awkwardly shivered upon the memory of the girl's question. _Do they actually care? Are they still disgusted?_

There was the fear, slowly creeping its way into my mind and telling me to do something even more foolish once again. My apartment was six blocks away from here, and well, I rode your car after all.

But it's not like. . . I'm hopeful.

"Hey."

I jumped upon the voice, from the surprise I became a stuttering mess; "Sei!"

_Sei._

I said it, didn't I?

Eventually, you curled your lips and the grin was visible, your multi-coloured eyes brightened and shone from a degree of amusement, and obviously glee. I hit your shoulder lightly, but decided to linger my touch upon the sleeves a little while longer.

"Why didn't you answer her properly, huh?"

You shrugged, and from the sincerity of your voice, I knew it was the truth; "I don't know. . . I don't really know what we are yet."

It sounded sad, but it was true.

"_How are things between Tetsu-kun, hm?"_

I totally could understand why you wouldn't want to answer it. It's as complicated as asking someone where they want to go to eat, and they answered the word "anywhere", but that was simply not the case.

Because we drew lines between each other, crossed it, drew it again.

And the answer is, we don't know.

We were both awkward that way.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

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**Mozu : /laughs evilly**

**Hey guys, I decided to split the ending. There'll be two endings. ****Bad ending and happy ending. Cause I wanna end this story badly (spoilers haha) but I don't wanna be an ass, so yeah. Two endings! Meaning 5 more chapters!**

**X for love, O for hate!**

**-Mozu The Mochi (2017)**


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